CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS, CHANGE YOUR LIFE

It is Never too Late to be What You Might Have Been. ~ George Eliot

 

I used to teach and counsel criminals. Yes, you read that right. No, I wasn’t extolling the virtues of a life of crime to my minions or teaching an underground network of  protégés how to execute the perfect crime a lá The Art of the Scam 101 (Yes, I just made that title up, adding italics for dramatic effect.) Rather, I taught life skills and interpersonal relations to small groups of incarcerated men prior to their release from a medium security prison back into mainstream society.  This bold initiative was part of a comprehensive Correctional Recovery program based on a cognitive-behavioral approach to change,  with the intended outcome of reducing risk of recidivism. Recidivism refers to the tendency of a convicted criminal to re-offend upon release into the community, thereby hastening a rapid return to prison, usually within the space of a year, and often within the first couple of months of freedom. By participating in this intensive curriculum, hardcore criminals learned new ways of thinking and acting while also developing prosocial problem solving skills and effective coping skills. This new social skillset empowered them to take responsibility for their life choices and enabled them to effectively deal with everyday stress and find alternative responses to stimuli, contrary to their lifelong, habitual patterns and maladaptive reactions to circumstances that created consequences that in most cases they did not intend or want. Through  the practice of mindfulness, they were able to cultivate self-awareness and gain  insight into their feeling states and motivations, an awareness process which enabled them to identify with and develop empathy for others. Contrary to popular opinion fueled by perceptual biases, or stereotypes, that are reinforced in the media and by some members of the law enforcement community, I found most of these convicts were actually good people who had families and loved ones, like you or I, but whose habitual patterns of impulsive choices, faulty thinking and maladaptive coping skills resulted in their criminal behavior and subsequent incarceration. Because they reacted to life, instead of responding after taking a moment to think it through, they committed irreversible damage with far-reaching consequences that they would regret for the rest of their life. “If only” was a common mantra echoed throughout the prison, reverberating off the prison walls, repeating mercilessly like an infinite feedback loop running through the mind of every inmate. I’m sure the same refrain of regret plays in many of our own heads as well, perhaps not to the same extreme, but nonetheless it is an all-too-common recurring theme that most of us are quite familiar with. How many times do we speak without first thinking how our words will impact the intended (or unintended – think children and bystanders) receiver, “automatically” blurting out hurtful words that we can never take back? Words matter! Or how often do we act impulsively, without weighing the pros and cons of our behavior, only to destroy a relationship, hurt a loved one or lose respect and trust from the people we care about most. It only takes a brief moment in time to alter the course of your entire life (and someone else’s) forever. Accordingly, a moment of forethought or flash of insight could save you from years of regret for doing something you later wish you hadn’t. Words spoken but later retracted still have lasting impact – once they are uttered into being, words take on a life of their own in the universe. Actions taken are often irreversible, despite any damage control or corrective action taken after the fact.

It all comes down to a matter of choice. The more informed the choice is, the greater the chance of it being the best course of action. Even a split second decision is chosen, however automatic the reaction may seem, based on your existing information or lack thereof, as well as your past experience, attitude, mood, beliefs and preconceptions. It is always wise to stop and breathe, to “slow the roll,” so momentum does not take over your rational choice. Step back and evaluate your options…if a situation permits, walk away as a means of interrupting the thought process or behavior sequence – this gives you time and space to shift your perspective and make a conscious choice without the pressure and subjectivity  caused by being “caught up” in the moment.

I hope that in my role as teacher, coach, mentor and counselor, I was able to change lives and make a lasting impact in the hearts and minds of those I served, as well as positively impact those people affected by my students’ choices and actions, including any victims, family members and loved ones in their past, present or future. I am grateful for the rewarding experience and valuable life lessons learned from my students during my time as a course facilitator for the Correctional Recovery Academy.

Anyone is capable of change, but it is not by any means a passive process, nor is real change forced onto someone through the external application of pressure or negative consequence. Our thoughts (and associated feelings) are what drives our actions, so any change must begin at the level of thought. Any action we do is driven by an internal desire, a desire to obtain a certain result, a perceived “payoff”, that is essentially a thought perceived experientially as either pleasure or relief from pain.

I cannot change anyone outside of myself,  but I can support someone who is willing and open to the possibility of change as well as facilitate the transformative process  through education, empathy, love, guidance, encouragement and positive feedback. If you are coachable and open minded, your possibilities are limitless, your potential is infinite and your power, beyond measure.

It matters not who you are or where you’ve been, you can write a new story and create the life of your dreams. Whether you are a card carrying member of the exclusive “Yeah but” club of exceptions to the rule or you wear your a defining label like a irrevocable badge of shame, i.e. lifelong criminal – chronic procrastinator – stressed out employee – “doubting Thomas” – down-on-your luck pessimist – stay-at-home mom lacking education or skills – divorcee going through a mid-life crisis – or any other self-identification as a proverbial underdog, you can drop the persona today, and begin exploring your authentic self, the person behind the mask, the person you could have been, had you not been indoctrinated with bullshit from the day you left the comfort and safety of the womb. 

In the inspiring words of George Eliot, “It is never too late to be what you might have been.”

Embrace change with open mind and grateful heart, as change is the only constant you can bet on in this life. Life, like the universe itself, is in perpetual motion, as evidenced by ever-expanding space, rotation of planets, the passage of time, the change of seasons, cellular formation, birth and death – change is happening on so many levels, from the microcosm to the macrocosm, contributing to growth and progress as well as to decompensation and decay. Feelings, thoughts and mood states are all temporary and transitory, changing from moment to moment, so it is pointless to get attached to anything. Even more wasteful is any effort or energy devoted to controlling things or events that are not within our internal locus of control. External events are subject to randomness so while we can appreciably influence outcomes, the presence of randomness, or chaos, may thwart our best intentions to control all variables. Surrender to the chaos, instead of resisting change, and you will move gracefully through it. The obstacle is the way…amidst the chaos and confusion you will find your inner sanctuary, where peace and order are always accessible to you. 

©️2019 Lisa Pearlman

 

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GREATNESS EXISTS IN ALL OF US

Hey fam! Sending Love and Light to each and every one of y’all, laced with “feel-good” vibes and positive intention. I hope y’all are staying safe and taking care of yourselves, your families and loved ones during this challenging and uncertain time. Although we currently are experiencing a period of global instability and economic upheaval all over the world, as well as disruption to our personal lives and social routines, we must remember this is a temporary crisis of epidemic proportions resulting from the sudden onset and rapid spread of COVID-19 (Corona Virus.) For now, we must accept and adjust to this “new normal,” but eventually the fog will lift and the sun will come out to shine another day. 🌞 Hang in there, be creative and most importantly DON’T PANIC, and you will find opportunities you never knew existed, and you will discover greatness within you that was previously hidden under a veil of prescribed “normalcy” and mind-numbing “status quo.” Everything happens for a reason, in its own time and its own season. And sometimes things fall apart, whether over time or (seemingly) all of a sudden, so they can reorganize and come together again in a stronger, more cohesive and progressive pattern or sequence. This is the way of the Universe, as it is with all energy forms in life and nature. The only way to order is through chaos. Nothing ever stays the same, change is the only constant. Everything is in perpetual motion, so don’t get attached to any one moment; take a breath, let it go, on to the next one. Mindfulness is your Freedom. I will continually post updates with helpful tips, inspiring content, and creative ideas to help you get through this time of transition and make the most of your home confinement, social isolation or “time off.” We will get through this together fam! Perhaps virtually rather than in-person, but nevertheless together, one wifi signal or unit of data at a time! Our connection to one another across the entire globe has never been more evident than it is now. The bonds of our common humanity that unite us in times of suffering are stronger than the superficial differences that divide us. And the miracle of connection, so powerful that it can traverse the globe and transcend distance, is truly transformational. All hail the Mighty Internet! 🙌🏽 LOL! But seriously, imagine the current world situation without the digital connection! 🤯🤪👾 We got this, fam! You are not alone! You will not be left behind! You are now faced with an unprecedented opportunity as much as it may also be be a challenge. Carpe Diem! Seize the day! You have been forced out of your “comfort zone” so why not start an extraordinary new adventure? Join me on the other side of fear if you want to level up your game and live the life of your dreams. It is possible! If I handed you the key to your best life, would you accept it and unlock the door? Or would you allow fear to make excuses for why you can’t do it until “the time is right” and walk away. NOW is YOUR time to shine like a diamond 💎 ➡️ JOIN ME –> https://salesvision.com/lisa-pearlman/

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Rise Up!

As we face this global pandemic and experience it in real time with all of its uncertainty and disruption to our daily lives, we must stay strong and resilient for ourselves and for our loved ones, and we must #RiseUp to the challenge in the face of adversity with our innate capacity for courage, compassion, empathy and most importantly, LOVE. Let’s unite, bonded in our common humanity, and support one another to ensure the best possible outcome for all of us. Be resourceful!image_77911007-b7c0-4ad1-9303-5f06d83f5521.img_5943Be tolerant! Be generous! Be Kind! We will get through this…light resides on the other side of darkness. Remember these two things: #ThisTooShallPass & #ILOVEYOU! (How will you #RiseUp? (Comment below ⬇️)

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No Dream Left Behind

“It’s Never Too Late To Be What You Might Have Been”

George Eliot

We all have dreams…think back to childhood…what did you fantasize about your life? What dreams motivated you as a teen…what did you want to do when you became an adult…what dreams did you shelve or put on hold for other people or obligations? Maybe you figured you would wait until [you moved out on your own – you saved some money – you got married – the kids were grown – life was more stable – or some perfect time in the future when the conditions were “just right”], then you could follow your dream and pick up where you left off, if you ever even got started. Somehow time got away from you, life got in the way and your Dream was your sacrifice. NOW is the right time to manifest your dream into reality – nothing is more important – ń stay focused and take your first baby step into your #newlife – you’re worth it!

Your #NewLife is waiting for you to say “YES! I’m worth it”
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Within Every Challenge, There is Opportunity

1. Hi there! If you have a quick minute, I would love for you to come play my new free and fun online game that shows you how to start or grow your business online.

2. Following the President’s Coronavirus Guidelines For America Official Document to quickly slow

It is never too late to be what you might have been.” ~ George Eliot

the spread of the coronavirus, found on CoronaVirus dot Gov, let’s do our part together by working and playing from home whenever possible. Join me! Free Access!

salesvision.com/lisa-pearlman

Sending positive vibes and healing prayers to y’all. We will get through this TOGETHER, albeit virtually instead of physically. Yes, the struggle is real, but so is the struggle “the way.” Just as “the obstacle is the way” on your path to success, it is through chaos that order emerges. Embrace the challenge, and seize the opportunity before you! Like the passage of sands through the hourglass, this too shall pass. When the clouds clear and the fog lifts, the sun will come out to shine another day, as will your greatness and beauty! Shine bright like a diamond, my dear friend!

Love & Light,

Lisa

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Happy Friday! #Gratitude

I love you unconditionally and am grateful to you for adding value to my life’s experiences. Life would not be the same without you in it… literally! Each and every one of us is here on Earth for a purpose… each one an integral part of the whole, yet uniquely valuable in one’s own essence… each a primary player on a journey of his/her own design, while also playing a supporting role in the journey of others. Life, reduced to its simplest formulaic equation, is a collaborative project, an impromptu, unchoreographed dance, unscripted play, a comedy of errors, with infinite potential and possibilities moving in and out of reality, an ever-changing combination of destiny and choice, a dance between nature and nurture, interacting within a time/space continuum with influence from both known and unknown players in the universe and beyond.

Remember, every day you wake up is a new day to reinvent yourself, a fresh opportunity to create your life by design. The Universe is ready and eager to co-create with you, to help you in manifesting your dreams and desires, transforming your thoughts into reality! Show up and be present for the experience, tuned in and ready to receive and match vibrations of the highest frequency, that of Love. Today, strive to be your best version of YOU! Wherever you go – go peacefully. Lead by example, not by force, and follow your heart only. Whatever you do – do it purposefully and give it your all. Act in alignment with your higher self. Be Love, personified. Smile, exude Gratitude, embrace Grace… connect to the infinite, pure light of source… receive its overflow, allowing it to filter through your heart and convert into positive energy and unlimited abundance, as it streams through you and shines outward to the world, energetically connecting you to all life forms. As you continue on your life journey, be open to all possibilities by trusting potential guides and helpers, in whatever forms, collaborations and transformations they may appear. Be kind to every being and entity that cross your path, be it human, animal or spirit… there are no chance encounters in life… no accidents… everything happens for a reason… all is inter-connected… every experience and relationship is meant to be, whether for a passing moment in time or for a lifetime and beyond. As you look into the eyes of a person or animal, look through his/her eyes beyond any physical presence… do you see your own reflection? As you look through those eyes and see deep into the soul, remind yourself that angels, including your guardian angel, can appear to you on Earth in any form at any time.

Stay well and have an awesome weekend!

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Happy Mothers’ Day Weekend

Hey fam!

Happy Friday!!! Thanks to y’all for your love and support!!! I love you unconditionally and am grateful to you for adding value to my life’s experiences. Life would not be the same without you in it… literally! Each and every one of us is here on Earth for a purpose… each one an integral part of the whole, yet uniquely valuable in one’s own essence, each a primary player on a journey of his/her own design, while also playing a supporting role in the journey of others.

Remember, every day you wake up is a new day to reinvent yourself, a fresh opportunity to create your life by design. The Universe is ready and eager to co-create with you and manifest your dreams and desires into reality! Show up and be present for the experience, tuned in and ready to receive and match vibrations of the highest frequency, that of Love. Today, strive to be your best version of YOU! Be kind to every being whom you cross paths with, human or animal… there are no chance encounters in life… no accidents… everything happens for a reason… all is inter-connected… every experience and relationship is meant to be, whether for a passing moment in time or for a lifetime and beyond. As you look into the eyes of a person or animal, look through his/her eyes beyond any physical presence… do you see your own reflection? As you look through those eyes and see deep into the soul, remind yourself that your guardian angel can appear to you on Earth in any form at any time.

Stay well and have an awesome weekend! Happy Mothers’ Day to all the Moms! If you are not a mom or you do not share a relationship with your own mother, honor someone “mother-like” whom you admire and/or love. And, most importantly, remember to honor and love yourself, unconditionally, just as you are. Namasté 🙏

Love & Light,

Lisa

💜✨💜✨💜✨💜✨💜✨💜

My photo was picked in the Top 10% in the #Green challenge on @twenty20app.https://www.twenty20.com/challenges/green-4 #photography #photocontests #mobiography #iphoneography #Twenty20

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Let’s Start a Revolution

Reposting this blog post from a couple years ago, as it seems even more appropriate now. with all the chaos, violence and disillusionment as of late. Whether it’s chaos with the current political climate in America, the deleterious effects of climate change and global warming on our planet, global instability, income inequality, mass school shootings, animal cruelty, human trafficking, bullying…fill in your own grievance or tragic event of choice…it is evident that significant change is needed now if we are to continue to survive and thrive as a human race as well as function as a pseudo-civilized society. Please be kind to one another and to your fellow living creatures. Fight Hatred, Injustice and Violence with Love, Compassion and Empowerment. Be a VOICE for the Voiceless, Be the Change you wish to see in the world. It is the only way out of this mess! It is the only way to evolve and awaken to our true potential.
Namasté ~ Love & Light to you all

Discombobulated Musings of a Scorpio Diva

The world needs Change. There is no question about that. The “Whys” are obvious and numerous. We can argue back and forth about the “What” since people’s values and priorities may differ based on their quality of life. But the million dollar question that keeps politicians, activists and anyone who truly cares about the state of our planet up at night is “How?” HOW do we affect change? HOW do we implement change of any real substance or staying power (longevity.) To quote The Beatles: “You say you want a Revolution? Well you know, we all want to change the world.”
A Revolution does not have to be marked by chaos, violence and power. Silence can be Revolutionary. Love can be Revolutionary. Spirituality can be Revolutionary. We must find peaceful, non-violent means to revolutionize and change things in this world, to change the status quo so as to improve life…

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Happy Valentine’s Day

(**I apologize for posting this a day late! I fell asleep before posting it on all my sites!**)

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY Cyber fam!

Whether or not you are single or in a romantic relationship matters not – celebrate YOU today! Be your own Valentine! Love Yourself! #DoYou!! Pamper yourself today!Celebrate family & friends! Smile warmly at strangers. And don’t forget to share your love with a 4-legged furry friend (or if you prefer, even a not-so-furry non-human being with 2 legs like a bird or no legs like a dolphin or dare I suggest, a snake?!) Remember your loved ones who have transitioned out of their bodies to the great beyond, and cherish those memories! Just for today, Choose Love! And you can make the same choice each and every day! You can mindfully choose Love over Hate every day, every hour, every minute! Practice and make LOVE a conscious habit! It’s your life and your choice, so why not create your reality mindfully and lovingly? Change begins with YOU! And ME! So BE THE CHANGE YOU WISH TO SEE IN THE WORLD!

Love Unconditionally…til the wheels fall off!

Following this, I am sharing a video of my personal memories with “My Fluffy Friends” (Spaz & Chyna) to celebrate LOVE today!

R.I.P. Spaz (July 2007- Jan 2016) 🐱🙏💜

Love & Light ~ Namasté

Lisa

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!

HAPPY NEW YEAR fam!!! 2017 is dead and gone! I’m over it! One for the history books! Wishing you a year of abundance in 2018! Let the co-creation commence now!

May you align your intent with Source energy to manifest your dreams into reality, and graciously accept from the Universe fulfillment of all personal needs. May you count among your blessings, Unconditional Love, Happiness, Success, Health, and Inner Peace. Be willing to manifest light where there is darkness. Share your light and positive energy freely, source is renewable and shared potential is infinite. In the infinite words of wisdom from Gandhi, “Be the Change You Wish to See in the World”; do not wait for “somebody” to act first…YOU are “somebody”…You are the one you’ve been waiting for! There is no director to yell “Action” or bark a command at you…it is your reality you are co-creating…you are in charge of your roleplay…you decide how to play it! Be Inspired by the light around you, slow your roll, experience the journey and appreciate the little gifts along the way. Experience is a teacher; Learn from mistakes. Suffering is central to the Human Experience, accept this premise; seek out the irony and absurdity in this and in all truths, and you will be rewarded with strength and resilience in face of adversity. Humor offers detachment by creating a shift in perspective; Laugh Loudly and Often. Show up and Be Present – Cultivate Awareness beyond Mind, without commentary, as the observer within – Be the Silent Witness who pays attention to all without Attachment to outcomes. Once you awaken this inner Witness, stay “Woke!” Tune in to the Miracles that reveal themselves at this higher level of consciousness. Love one another. Love all creatures, big and small. Respect the sanctity of Life itself. Speak and act with Compassion and Respect toward all sentient beings. Promote kindness whenever possible; it is always possible. Love Unconditionally. We are all in this together!

One Love & One Light Eternal,

Lisa

Namasté

©️2018 Lisa Pearlman

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